Its always better to let go your anger, but how?
Anger is a natural human
emotion. It is also healthy to express your dissatisfaction or frustration (that led to anger being manifest within you) rather than let your pent up emotions simmer over a long period of time and give you blood pressure and other related problems. It is how you express this is what is important.
- Count to Ten Before Letting Off Steam: So you are blowing your top and suddenly you realize that you are saying things in the heat of the moment that you are already regretting. Remember that you can’t take back your words. So it is always better to take a breath, as they say, count slowly to ten, and then say what you want to say in a more measured way. Your quiet words will have a better impact than your anger.
- Physical Outlets: Anger does not allow you to think straight. In order to release the pent up emotions, a brisk walk or run helps get rid of the tension and allows you to think clearly. Anger also creates physical knots of tension. Gently massage your neck and shoulders and roll your shoulders back and forth to release the tension. If feeling angry, remove your thoughts from the source of anger and try to picture yourself in pleasant surroundings, or turn on some soft music to cool your agitation.
- Choose the Issues: Uncontrolled or frequent angry outbursts over small, unimportant things can be hurtful to both you and the persons towards whom your anger gets directed. Apart from creating constant friction and tension, it also leads to people not taking your outbursts seriously after a while. It is better to choose the issues that are truly important to you and resolve these through expressing your displeasure or disappointment in a controlled manner.
- Use Cold Logic: To deal with hot rage, turn to cold logical thinking. You may often find that if you sit down and think about it later, the issue was not worth your anger. So restructure your approach to things by telling yourself that ‘flying into a rage’ is not going to help you. What is going to help you is approaching things in a rational fashion, however frustrated, disappointed and angry they may make you. Once your attitude changes towards how you react to things that irk you, you will find that you will become calmer and a less angry individual.
- Powers of Persuasion: To make people see your point of view, use the powers of persuasion rather than aggression. Using anger as a tool for control only works up to a point. However, it creates an unhealthy atmosphere whether used at home or the workplace, leaving everyone concerned at an edge. It is better to sit down, talk, and figure things out in a spirit of collaboration rather than control.
- Make a Plan: It may be sometimes that however hard you try, no resolution of an event or situation takes place. You have to accept it, however angry it makes you. In such a case, it may help if you formulated a plan to deal with it. Check your progress against the parameters you have set. If the plan does not work, then change it again till you find something that helps you deal with the non-resolvable issues without giving vent to anger.
- Try Humour: When things look bleak and make you angry, humour often helps keep anger at bay. This is one way of coping with things and when the anger goes away, you will be glad you did not burst a gasket at the time.
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